Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Pure? What does it mean?

If Sylvia Plath didn't know I sure as shit don't know. Fresh from my salt bath I stare into the cracked mirror and see Laura Ingalls Wilder. I have my pa. I have my penny candy. I've banged dust from erasers and put the chickens to bed. Hot double date tonight. Me. Almanzo. John Boy Walton. Kimberly Drummond. Will I order lemonade? No. Vanilla milkshake? No. I'm feeling kind of frozen margarita.

BACON

Bacon is for breakfast. Bacon is for now. Bacon is bikini. Bacon is sex. Bacon is Kevin. Bacon is serious. Bacon is bueno. Bacon is flavor. Bacon is mine. Bacon with scrambled cage free eggs no cheese but onions and Tabasco. Bacon beach. Bacon casa. Bacon oh god yes and masmasmas. Bacon urge. Bacon splurge. Bacon baby. Bacon yes not bacon maybe. Bacon from pig not from turkey. Bacon on china. Bacon on tongue. Bacon in mouth. Bacon in belly. Bacon without jelly. Bacon without telly. Bacon washed down with cold lime infused cerveza. Bacon is art which outlasts la vida loca. Bacon bacon baaacon. Bacon beyond all borders.

FREE

Free books. Free besos. Free brownies. Free bibles. Free kittens. Free puppies. Free worms. Free branches. Free bruises. Free fire. Free salt. Free pain. Free nausea. Free stress. Free blanket. Free socks. Free coupons. Free barbecue. Free sex. Free circus. Free bondage. Free Barbie. Free lipstick. Free panties. Free Jaguar. Free slurp. Free nudge. Free fish. Free lecture. Free brick. Free pizza. Free hair. Free lion. Free song. Free grandfather. Free climb. Free glue. Free huh. Free oh. Free sugar. Free never. Free muerte. Free righteous. Free shudder. Free diet. Free Mercury.

I LOVE YOKO ONO

Any breathing cognizant being can proclaim undying love for Yoko Ono. I LOVE YOKO ONO. Motherfucker did you HEAR me?! I said I wrote I asserted that I LOVE YOKO ONO!!! Yes. No doubt. You've purchased all her albums and books. If Yoko Ono has some big deal thing going on your ass is there planted in the front row. But were you there hugging Yoko Ono when she was covered in John's blood? Did you bake her a chocolate cake and make her a pot of tea? Did you babysit Sean for free? When your husband/wife said,"That Yoko Ono is one nutty witch." did you divorce his/her hateful smug Aquarius bashing ass? No worries, as they say. We are you are I am free to love Yoko Ono and anybody else I deem worthy from a comfortable distance.

Purple Jelly Beans

There is no reason on this planet for purple jelly beans to exist yet they do. With tongue waggling defiance purple jelly beans continue to be manufactured, purchased and consumed. Why am I zeroing in on PURPLE jelly beans? Why not white jelly beans or black jelly beans or green jelly beans. Or. Or. Am I a colorist? No. The only hair I dye is my own and I'm not especially good at it although I have thirty-nine years of experience. The idea popped into my head and I dug it so much I tweeted it. And now I'm Chupacabra Discoing it. Superfluity abounds on this pretty yet seriously distressed celestial body. Purple jelly beans. Red jelly beans. Crystal meth. Green Day songs. Green Day t-shirts. Beyonce songs. Tweets and essays defending Beyonce songs and videos. Creative writing workshops. Creative nonfiction. Memoirs. Paintings of cattle. Paintings of mountains. Facebook rants and raves and rambles. Poems about sitting in a bar. Poems about awkward encounters with the homeless. Sitcoms. Tom Hanks movies. Julia Roberts movies. Guns. Plastic spoons. Windex. Flavored condoms.

Monday, September 26, 2016

Business Cards. Books. Beauty Products.

The world is saturated with business cards and books and beauty products. This person has this business card. What does this person have to offer? Hot dogs. Mustard is extra. This person has this book. What is this book about? Baseball. Sex. Jumbo pretzels. Melting ice cubes. Pepsi spiked with Jim Beam. This book is about your mother's colorful uncle. He was famous for his freak show act. What did he swallow? Swords, I guess. Don't yawn yet. This person has this beauty product. You've never in your life seen lipstick this vivid. It stays on until you die so your mouth better not be fickle! You love that Stripper High Heels Red lipstick so much? You better marry it. There will be no divorce. 

GERTRUDE STEIN IS ROLLING

once lavender but pickle and urgency and less cordial
did flourish did amble did glisten did bible did suicide
oh gentle oh thimble and yet but oh and then and then
squirt squeeze pornographic oops butter oops aspirin
there is bottom in the vacant there is top in the capacity
eventually travel where Peru there Peru star the chart
and row and row and row and row
and across the block the fudge the mess
the bunny man arsenal
the vomit happy
on wheels they go
they do they go they do
where and who and what
squeaking needing never having
call them to supper
bell will wheedle
needle will darn
they're paper
they're yarn
they're nada
cake crumbs
dumb dolls
dregs
quite dead
expired nickel
valentines